Saturday, July 31, 2010

Inception: Lucid Dreaming

*there are no spoilers*

I had this blog written and ready to post...then I erased it all and started over. It was a little too revealing about the things I dream about.

If you haven't seen it, go. It's entertaining, even if you don't have the slightest clue what a lucid dream is. For people who think Nolan created lucid dreaming up solely for the purpose of his movie, do your research. It's very real and I've been dreaming like that since I was 12 years old. I don't remember any of my other dreams I have and it is a big contributor to my insomnia. It's pretty cool to control your imagination when you're a kid because there are so many things about life you aren't aware of yet. Your subconscious tends to be a LOT more innocent and pure. As an adult? Not so much.

It comes as a relief to be able to dream about things that you could NEVER do without serious repercussions but at some point...you have to wake up.  Sometimes, the life I have dreaming is FAR better than my reality so it's almost like taking drugs. Do you continue to remove yourself from reality as much as possible or do you wake the hell up and just deal with life like normal people? My trade off for dealing with life like a normal person is not sleeping too much.

A 20-30 minute stretch of sleep ALWAYS feels like 2-3 hours. I can always start a dream where I left off; I can tell when it is about to end; I see everything in FULL color. So watching this movie was entertaining at some points, terrifying at others. I think it was an accurate portrayal of how the mind works when you seek to control your subconscious. The tricky thing about your brain is...there are some parts that you've never used in your life and what if they decide to kick in while you're sleeping? Who would believe the things that come out of your brain, but you? So a lot of my thinking, I transfer into my fiction writing or I'll discuss with Babybottoms dad. He has a pretty over active brain so he understands someone who is always thinking. We have some of the most interesting conversations because of topics I will bring up. Most of the time he has no idea it has anything to do with something I've dreamed about but sometimes you just gotta get that crap out of your head. It's far worse to continue having the same dream over and over...that you're controlling. In a word, it becomes: insanity.

I love EVERYTHING about cinema. I understand the screenwriters, producers, and directors minds. They have a vision that they've conjured up and put on a screen for the world to see. This is why I love movies like The Matrix, Avatar, Star Wars, Empire Strikes Back, 300, The Neverending Story, Legend, Mad Max, Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, Fifth Element, and Ice Pirates. Those movies are the stuff dreams are made up. Any type of epic film (and not in the slang terminology) requires a LOT of imagination and I've always been inspired by the people who come up with them. 

One day, I'll be able to share my imagination with the world much like these amazing screenwriters, directors, and producers. Then...I will FULLY appreciate all of the lucid dreams I've had.

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

If You Don't Care, Why Are You STILL Talking About It?

How many times have you heard/read, "I'm so over it!", "I could really care less", "This is a thing of the past", only to see/hear the same person CONTINUE to hint at/talk about that same thing that is supposed to be of such insignificance in their life? Not only is it irritating as hell, it makes the person saying those things look like a complete and utter fool. Usually when someone does not care to give a situation or person any more of their energy, they stop mentioning it altogether. 

I'm not saying that you can't vent and be upset about things that happen in your life. That is a normal reaction and everyone is allowed to do that but downplaying a situation to make it appear to others that you're this pillar of strength? It does the exact opposite. You haven't succeeded at anything but making people laugh and shake their head at you.

Personally, if something is bothering me, I will talk to one of my close friends about it until I feel I am "over it". Sure, people might bring it up again but I have good enough sense to know that if I am not going to take the time to tell the whole story, I need to just keep my mouth shut. Sometimes it feels good to play the victim because you get the sympathy/empathy from others that you wish you could be getting from the person you were obviously hurt by. I think that's normal, however, you should never make a fool of yourself, attempting to make a fool of someone else.

I've had some shitty stuff happen to me in my lifetime and there are times I will share it with others through my writing or I will turn it into a draft when I see it isn't anything I want to discuss with others. I make sure I give ALL of the information so that if anyone is going to form an opinion of me or the other person involved, it will be fair. Some might think to themselves, "why would I care to be fair to someone who was unfair to me" but if you're such the "bigger person" out of the situation, why wouldn't you want to be fair? Anytime I have knee jerk responses to other people, it is because I didn't care to think about anything I intended to say or do. However, I know that if there was even a slight chance that I would be in contact with this person again, I pause. I genuinely like certain people, regardless of whether they like me back so if anyone is going to burn a bridge, it isn't going to be me.

Some people I have no problem letting go of but others...they mean more to me than a tantrum I can throw on Twitter, Facebook, Tumblr, or when I'm having girl talk. If at anytime, I felt that my relationship meant something with someone, platonic or otherwise, I watch my mouth because just like some actions cannot be forgotten, words can damage just the same. We're all human so there will be some slip ups, I'm sure but everyone reading my blog is an adult so it shouldn't be too hard to stop talking about things you really don't care about...if you really have moved on.

"it was all good just a week ago..."

-Jay-Z

Friday, July 16, 2010

Post Racial Society = Long Journey

Consistent and willful intolerance of others is hard for me to ingest. It offends me when ANYONE attacks someone because of who they were born as. No one ASKS their creators for the skin color, hair texture, physical features, or family they are born with/into.

What makes us different is the information we choose to feed ourselves. Constantly eating from a table that only supplies hateful fodder about others and that conjures a spirit of "them vs. us"…it will harden your soul in areas you may not even realize. As human beings, why has it not clicked with the masses that the change comes about when you seek to do the opposite of what has been done to you?

If someone rapes you, do you eagerly search for someone else to rape so they will know how you feel? No. You speak against it because you do not EVER want anyone to experience that horribly traumatic event. Why people do not view the hating of one another the same, baffles me. Hating someone because they are not similar to you, from an outward perspective, is counterproductive behavior.

I learned at a young age that just because my elders tell me something, that does not make it true/right. Some of my family openly refer to White people as "crackers" and "honky" but when they read or hear a White person refer to Black people as "nigga" or "nigger", it INSTANTLY becomes a problem. There are MANY people like this indoctrinating their children and grandchildren with the same hypocritical ass backward belief system. It was not okay when your ancestors were forced to pick cotton and it is not okay now that they have attained some level of freedom. So why do some people continue to adopt this attitude? In my mind, THAT'S self hate. You should love yourself and any future generations enough to DO BETTER.

The only way our society will ever be post racial is if EVERYONE makes a conscious effort to know and believe that one ethnicity is NEVER better than another. Having pride in who you are is a beautiful thing. Cutting others down to do it? THAT…is hateful, ugly and sets you so far back in the race for equality that you might want to quit now if you never seek to change.
When will people truly believe this? When will ALL of us REALLY do better?

The cruelest lies are often told in silence
- Robert Louis Stevenson
 

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