Monday, March 01, 2010

Babybottoms: Guess Who Got Their Ears Pierced?

So I didn't really get her ears pierced to punish her for caterwauling at 5 in the morning every day. I got them pierced because isn't that what you're supposed to do with little girls?

Anyway, our day started out perfect. I dressed her up and as she got all excited to get in her car seat, I laid the news on her. It didn't  upset her day; she was about to go for a ride in the truck and NOTHING could mess that up. We get to the mall and she's being a ham for everyone who walks up to the stroller. I didn't have to work at keeping her in a good mood. She had a fresh diaper, had just finished her bottle before we got in the truck and now she had more attention then she knew what to do with at the mall. Baby heaven is what she was in.

I will admit that it took me so long because I didn't want to go to Claire's or any other place similar. Teenagers piercing my beloved seeds ears? No. I worked in Claire's before...those girls aren't as clean as I would like them to be when dealing with such precious cargo. After some searching on the internet, I found a Piercing Pagoda. I was still a little iffy about taking her there because...teenagers seem to work at EVERY store in the damn mall. I took my chances and I was relieved to see two people working there that looked to be in their mid to late 20's. 

After listening to the young lady replay a story about some mom who hadn't cleaned her daughters ears in a million ears, I knew I had the person I wanted. Babybottoms was giggling and cooing her life away in the stroller...unaware of the pinching sensation she was about to experience.

I was instructed to hold her arms together so she couldn't knock the piercing tool out of the ladys hand and I had to hold her head still as well. My child does not like being confined or restricted unless it is her choice so we got a few grunts of discontent. I let the lady know that she better hurry up because this kid is like a mini Incredible Hulk when it comes to strength. I watched her do the first ear and about near died in the chair. I'm by no means a punk but anytime Babybottoms gives me that "mommy, help me please" look, I just want to die...and kill whoever is making her produce that face. I was seconds from saying forget it before she did the second ear but I couldn't have my daughter looking like an ass clown with just one ear done. I closed my eyes when she got to the next ear.

Babybottoms is gangster, in case I haven't mentioned this before. When she got her first shots, she was more shocked than anything and her cries didn't last for more than 3 seconds. This was pretty much how it went with her next shots and this ear piercing situation. When she was younger though, I would apologize and try to kiss her and she'd just turn her face like I was a traitor. This always made me feel even more horrible but hey, you have to get your shots kiddo.

I asked her if she was okay after the piercing was all done and she turned around, tears still streaming down her face and screamed at me. If I was a Baby Whisperer, I'm sure the translation would have been, "No, bitch!" Everyone standing there watching me.  Babybottoms kept up this scream any time I would speak to her until we got to the car. It wasn't a continuous scream though. When I opened my mouth to say ANYTHING to her, she would scream AT ME. I almost wanted to take her back and get a second set of piercings just to show her who's boss...then I remembered she's 5 months old and I'm 30 years old.

So far, she's doing good. No screaming or protesting when it's time to clean them and she's been camera ready. I almost feel like she knows she has pierced ears because every angle she's giving me has her little stud(s) showing. However I did have a bit of a scare this morning.

I asked her dad to hold her while I went to get her solution to clean her ear and he yells:

"Syn, come here! Her ear is turned purple!"

The only thing I could think was how fast can I get my clothes on and get back to the mall so I could put my foot in that chick's ass for infecting my child. I rushed to get my robe on and flew out the bedroom only to get to Babybottoms and she's fine. What her dingbat daddy didn't recognize is that it was the ink that they mark your ear with when you get them pierced. I just sat there shaking my head...he was about to have me in jail for assault and battery over this child's damn ear.

I know she's my child and some of you might think I'm bias but I swear she got like 10 times cuter since she got her ears pierced. Not that she wasn't already a cutie pie :)

10 points of view:

msdailey said...

I'm enjoying your interaction with your baby and her spit fire personality!! She's a cutie!! :)

Danielle87 said...

Ur posts are always so hilarious. I love reading them because I know I will end up having a good laugh.

jeanette nicole* said...

Love the Babybottoms posts. She's got a ton of personality already! :)

Chicken said...

I can-NOT believe I haven't been following you earlier. You are too funny! And babybottoms is adorable!

Relevantlystaying said...

I agree with everyone else. I LOVE the babybottoms post! Thank you for your comment as well I really appreciate it! I dont comment much but I do visit you weekly..

Beez said...

Your baby is a gangster. I am afraid, very afraid.

Unknown said...

I think you need to rename Babybottoms, Gangsta Boo! LMBO!!! She is such a cutie though!

ray said...

AS IF it was possible for her to get any cuter! This little girl is giving all little girls a run for their money, that little personality of hers and now...her bling!
i feel like piercing is a lot like circumcision...if its not done when youre a baby, forget about that means youre a really good mommy for having it done now!!!

ChoColAte KiSs said...

I look forward to stuff you write about your daughter..she seems to be as feisty out the womb as you complained she was while she was in

Jenny Brown said... this post! Your daughter is adorable! Wished we lived closer so that I could babysit! (I don't have little ones any more) I'm patiently waiting for grandchildren! :):) What a cutie!

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