Wednesday, July 08, 2009

PSA: Stop Thinking Everything Is About You

How many times have you read something that seemed like it was a page torn right out of your life? The USUAL response is one of "PREACH", "AMEN", or some other words/comment that expresses that you relate to what was written. That's how most people end up reading other people's blogs. Other times, you might be going through something in life and out of the blue you read something that is relevant to your life experience...almost like this person is speaking directly to you. At times, you might feel like "Ok, well I don't agree" but at the same time, it sits in the back of your mind as someone who experienced something similar but felt different than you.

So my question is...why does this change FOR SOME PEOPLE if what is written is by someone they personally know? Why do people AUTOMATICALLY assume you're talking about THEM? I will never "get" why some people are SO self-assuming. I just want to shake them and tell them that the world does not revolve around JUST them. For every 1 thing you go through, there are hundreds of thousands of other people going through something similar.

For instance...one of my friends wrote a blog about "friends" with benefits. He stated his opinion on it and of course his blog was open to other people's opinions. I could have taken it personal like "Oh, this fool is talking about me and what I went through" but I didn't. For one, he didn't address me. Granted, he has some details as to a relationship I was involved in that was EXACTLY what he mentioned but is that to say he can NEVER write about it because we've discussed it in the past? Nope. He can write about whatever he feels as long as he isn't saying things or using MY EXACT SITUATION to let me know, "Hey, Syn, I'm talking bout you nigga". I actually commented on the blog because hey, we all have our opinions, whether we agree or not. Plus, I know he wasn't targeting me. He was just writing about something that probably crossed his mind.

Maybe I just don't read much into other people's opinions but there are A LOT of people who network online that do and I think they all need chill pills. If you're a spoiled brat and someone you know writes about how spoiled brats irritate them, don't be salty; that's just how they feel about spoiled brats. They might reserve a special place for you and your brattiness to be tolerated. If you run off at the mouth a lot but someone STILL chooses to be friends with you but they happen to write something about someone they ran into that was running off at the mouth, that doesn't mean they are talking about your sensitive ass.

Even though I have a rainbow coalition of friends/associates, there are some that behave the same. There are certain people that I go through similar things with; sometimes I write about it, sometimes I don't. To sit here and sift through people that MIGHT get offended about something I MIGHT write is utterly ridiculous because I can PROMISE you, NONE of them do that. When I write, I simply write about what's relevant to me at that very moment. If I've experienced the same thing with several different people in a short period of time, 9 times out of 10, I will write about it from my viewpoint. I'm not writing about one person in particular; just writing what's on my mind....like MOST writers who ACTUALLY write.

I must say that blogging/writing is sometimes a one-way street of expression for some people...they want to be free to ruminate on whatever flows through their mind, whenever it flows there, and then get it out, whether it's through blogging, notes, poetry, or any other form of writing...but if for some reason they are having an "I'm sensitive" day, you better watch what you say/write because you MIGHT offend them.

And what I have to say to that is f*ck your entire life because I'll write about what I damn well please, when I please. Don't like it, stop reading/stop talking to me. Grow some thicker skin if you still wanna be my friend/associate, otherwise, we aren't the people for each other. EVERYTHING I WRITE IS NOT ABOUT ONE SINGULAR PERSON, UNLESS I SAY IT IS.

Everyone, have a nice day!

smiley Pictures, Images and Photos

10 points of view:

a black girl who did date said...

That is not a happy face and I rebuke it Satan!!!! Thank you for stating the obvious because some folx just don't get it.

NightFall914 said...

Yeah I noticed that too. But hey the guilty usually incriminate themselves so if I wasn't writing about a particular person, that type of "you talkin gto me?" reaction is always interesting.

jeanette nicole* said...

I tend to get those "Is that blog about me?!" responses from friends IRL. If I'm blowing someone's spot up, I tend to give them notice. If you haven't gotten any notice, then fall back sucka!

Black Yoda said...

Nice P.S.A. People do need to have thicker skin. I've never had my feelings hurt over the internet. And if I did, that would just mean I'm spending too much time here. It's really not that serious. If you could see some of the responses I've received over the years. Let's just say there's a lot of sensitive folx out there.

Assertive Wit said...

black girl: it was that face or a smiley with the middle finger up LOL I remember back when I was writing blogs on MySpace, one of my friends would ALWAYS ask me to write about certain stuff. It never pertained to me but I would write it from my perspective. So many people used to send me side emails asking, "were you talking about me?"...cricket? NO I WASN'T, GOSH! So sensitive!

NightFall914: the guilty do tell on themselves; frankly IF I think it's about me, I'll let it go because hey, I could be wrong. Now when I KNOW you're writing about me (it's happened twice so far), I'll email you or call you to confront you. It's really that simple. People make things far more difficult than they have to be LOL

jeanette nicole: blogs I write where I am DIRECTLY mentioning someone, I REALLY don't care if they read it or not, whether it be something deemed "good" or "bad"; if I was afraid they'd read it, I wouldn't write it LOL

Black Yoda: When dealing with me in person, I use tact as much as possible because 9 times out of 10, I can SEE how you feel or are receiving something I'm saying. When writing online, there is no way in hell to determine who is going to take offense to what you have to say EVEN when you're joking so yes, tougher skin is required when online.

Solomon said...

Great advice, I don't take anything very seriously if I can help it. It's just a waste of good energy. I know people are trying to blow me up all the time, but it ain't worth gettin' all crazy and worked up over.

I got a good laugh outta this one because some people just take everything way to personal!

Jay_fever said...

I almost hate to write my reply after reading the first paragraph...lol. But yeah...I'm definitely feeling this joint. And quite frankly I hate having to write disclaimers...but I'm not trying to accidentally hurt peoples feelings. If I'm gonna do something, I like for it to be intentional.

♥Nikki Ms.Healthy KISSES♥ said...

Your such a passionate writer. Luvs it. As for the "their writing about me" feeling..:( Im guilty...lol, but this chic really was though and she tried to play it off when I commented! lol. I have a feeling that if you knew me you would tell me off everyday..LMAO.

Assertive Wit said...

Jay: I used to tell Ronnie and Lateef don't be giving out no disclaimers LOL but they are necessary. And the funny thing about this particular blog is I'm CLEARLY stating for people to STOP thinking everything is about them and what happens? Someone emails me insinuating that I wrote this especially for them...just hard head!!!!

As for accidentally hurting someone's feelings, that's why it's called an accident LOL you don't know when someone is gonna come online and choose to self-apply when they get to what you are writing about...that's their damn problem, not yours LOL

Nikki: I don't know enough about you to tell you off :) so far, you're good though LOL

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