Monday, May 11, 2009

My Take On Obsessed

From the moment I saw the previews for the movie Obsessed, I had decided it was a movie I was going to pay to see in the theater...not because Beyonce was in it. While I am a fan of Beyonky, her acting usually just makes me cringe. I went to see it for none other than the delectable Idris Elba. Oh yes, and I wanted to see how crazy they made Ali Larter act. The sad thing about the character Ali Larter played is that there are FAR MORE women out there (not just WHITE women...don't get it twisted ALL RACES got crazy batches like this) who are CLEARLY delusional when it comes to some man they are acting like they can't live without.

Question: what were you doing before he came along? you were alive right? so what in the name of all things holy makes you think you'll die without him now? ESPECIALLY women who don't even know or have never had a relationship with the man in question...you for real crazy as hell. Go read a book or learn how to cook a quiche...translation? GET A LIFE YOU CRAZY HEFFA. All that craziness Ali was doing in the movie...some of it was unreal. NOT how she was acting...how she was being dealt with.

I can remember a part in the movie where Beyonce got to be her over the top self. She was in the kitchen carrying on and trying to put her husband out the house. I have a point to make in relation to how Ali was being dealt with but let us take a second to analyze "Sharon"/Beyonce during the kitchen scene. She yelled out, "GET OUT MY HOUSE!!!"

I leaned over and whispered to Baby Daddy, "Ummm, yo house? You don't have a job and the last job you had, you were your NOW husbands assistant. Heffa shut up and stop being dramatic!"

But most of the time when a husband and a wife get into an argument this heated, what happens? He gets kicked out. For real? This man pays ALL the bills and you feel the right to kick him out? "Sharon" you'd be NOTHING without him. Seriously her character didn't decide to go back to school until she married him. So it aint like she could afford that mortgage on her own AND she was asking him if she COULD work again in the beginning of the movie WHICH signified....SHE PAID NO BILLS IN THAT BIOTCH.

I can understand her feeling somewhat betrayed because she had no idea what was going on and not wanting to sleep with him until she got some clarity. So don't sleep in the same bed but putting that man out HIS OWN HOUSE? I'd leave before I put someone else out of THEIR own house. On second thought, he would leave on his own because I have the ability to live in the same house as someone and act like they don't exist. It's one of my Super Powers.

So back to "Sharon's" kitchen scene...I agree with her point that it was his fault it had gotten this far. He dropped the ball SO many times on taking care of this raggedy heffa who called herself in love with a man she didn't know. Granted, he was scared at one point considering how he met his wife (at work/his former assistant) but "Sharon" had a point...their relationship had been based on trust and honesty. No matter how crazy the story was, he should have told her soon after that episode in the bathroom. I do understand him stalling when he got home and she was all bent outta shape about her sisters cheating azz husband but before he went to work the next morning he should have talked to her.

When that heffa was all in the car in her panties...another opp to tell his wife.

When he was in the office with HR...another opp to tell someone.

Need I go on? Because he had a good 3 more chances thereafter but kept the people most important to him on a need to know basis. THIS is a common mistake a LOT of people make in relationships then wonder why omission of the truth is viewed as lying. Ummm, because if you have the opportunity to tell the truth about something and you don't, you might as well lied about it cause you sure as hell didn't have a problem hiding the truth. Which is why it's viewed as lying.

So final issue with the movie is the end...for real Beyonce/Sharon? You gone try to save the SAME woman who is TRYING VEHEMENTLY to kill you? I'm sorry and Lord forgive me but my heart isn't that good. I would have did the A-town stomp on that hoe's fingers to make sure she fell to her death. I'm not playing. It's kill or be killed in these streets and that crazy heffa was trying to kill you. Dummy.

Overall, I was entertained...especially the sidebar dialogue me and Baby Daddy was whispering back and forth. The whole time I was laughing to myself because his mom told him to go see it so he can see how to deal with these crazy bitches once he get some money of his own. Her words, not mine and his dad was probably just sitting there shaking his head like please calm down.

After watching it I also decided to send Beyonce's management another letter telling them why it's a good idea for them to get her a linguist. One of my old managers wife is a Speech Coach and she can help her. I mean, if Hugh Jackman and Nicole Kidman can sound as American as apple pie, there is no reason why her Bama ass gotta still sound country as hell in EVERYTHING every time she open her mouth (Beyonce folks, keep up). It irritates me that she NEVER changes her voice to suit her roles. I swear before little baby Jesus if Stan Lee allows her to be She Hulk, I will march to Marvel Entertainment and set it on fire because at that point, they would clearly need to stop making movies due to their bad judgement of character placement.

And that's about it...

10 points of view:

jeanette nicole* said...

You hit the nail on the head with everything you said in this post! My girlfriends and I made some people angry when we went to see this movie because of all of our whispering amongst each other. Every time he missed an opportunity to tell someone about psycho baby, the theatre would hear a collective, "SERIOUSLY?!" from the three of us.

Also, I stan for Bey like no other, but this movie just proves once again that she needs to stay in her lane. She needs to stick to what she's good at and leave the acting alone.

Craigjc said...

LOL. Get Beyonce a linguist! Ha! tHAT'S wild. You know dem pepo from Houston.

♥Nikki D.City Star♥ said...

I was thinking the same thing "What's up with her voice?!" acting means ACTING like someone else. She was Beyonce as usual. The movie was good in a "nothing grand" kind of way, but entertaining :). Funny post.

NaturallyAlise said...

I cosign in Sharpie Marker on resume paper in front of a notary on getting that po thing a linguist... she drives me batty with the same coutrified accent, get it together Be'yawn'ce...

N.I.K.E. & Martian Lewis said...

"Go read a book or learn how to cook a quiche..."

Ha! Wow!

Like I Told Everybody Esle Who Saw It Or Wanted To See It.

The Shit Belongs On Lifetime!

ChiChi10 said...

ITA! Idris' character was pissing me off not saying anything to Bey.

And though she wasn't as horrible as I thought she would be, she still needs to work on it and for GOD'S SAKE lose the accent! SMH

ChiChi10 said...

*I forgot to mention my cousins from Houston used to talk about me and my brother's NOLA accent.

PLEASE!

laughing808 said...

it was a hard decision for me to NOT go see this movie, cause I surely wants to see Idris as much and often as I can.......LOL, But Beyonce and the thought of her acting made me break out in hives. She is that bad. I'll just wait for the DVD release and buy a used copy somewhere.

Gadget Geek said...

lol, too funny! I was thinking the same thing when watching the movie. I was like is it just the yankee in me or does she sound country as hell??? Even Idris Elba is British, he had me fooled, I thought he was from NY fo sho. Here he is speaking with his natural accent http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G6Ror7aia78

Great post as always!

Emeritus said...

girl you ain't NEVAH lied!

everything you said was on dot.

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