Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Funny Monday Has Become Funny Wednesday

Today turned into Funny Wednesday shortly after I took a seat at my desk and signed into my gmail.

I'm going to share something with anyone reading. If you are a REAL friend of mine (not just someone who pretends to be when they are bored and need someone to send an email to) you ALREADY know this and this blog will come as no surprise to you:

For as long as I have been able to "call it like it is", I have also called people out for what they are. Therefore, if you are a sad, sorry son of a biotch, well, that is what I will call you. It just is what it is. Stop being a sad, sorry son of a biotch and I won't feel compelled to state the obvious to you. My FRIENDS are exempt from "name calling" because that's just rude. Why would I want to call someone I view as a friend some rude azz name like that? But...if you are acting like a clown, I have no qualms telling you. If you're being an azzhole, I'll tell you too. I've never been one to sugarcoat too much, although there are some people I have to season my words with salt a little to keep from unnecessarily hurting their feelings...IF they are my friend.

Now, if I end up not being friends with someone, I will still exude some level of tact if the parting was not anything of significant mentioning. Now, should they do something out of line and show their azz...well, all bets are off. We aren't friends so I don't owe them ANY kind of tact whatsoever. If someone is acting like a little punk azz b*tch, that is EXACTLY what I will call them. Does that ALL OF A SUDDEN make me a name caller? Nope, according to what I just stated, you could have always called me a name caller; it just wasn't funny anymore once you or someone you know was on the receiving end. This is who I ALWAYS was and will always be. I just never called some people anything other than friend BECAUSE we WERE friends. Now that we aren't, they don't get a pass due to our past. F*ck outta here.

What is absolutely hilarious to me is some of these same people who want to sit there looking stuck on stupid that I could call someone out for EXACTLY how they were acting ALREADY know I will clown you if you aren't my friend. You been knew that. Don't act brand new because all of sudden someone you like or yourself might be on the receiving end of the boot to the neck.

I make up names for people who act silly too.

Meerkat McBootsy...it was appropriate at the time for the person I had christened with this name. ANYONE who EVER heard me refer to her as such laughed their azz off. Sure was funny then, huh? Squirrel Nubbins...I just randomly thought of this name one day just because it was funny. I didn't make it up to hurt their feelings. It was just funny as hell to me and it stuck. ANYONE WHO EVER HEARD ME USE IT OR WRITE IT LAUGHED THEIR AZZ OFF. Slutalea Hoenette...same thing. Out of the above mentioned "names", one had been my friend since I was about 10. She did some trifling shat (when I was about 26) that I personally couldn't see past. Bottom line...if we aren't friends, why should I care about what I call you? I shouldn't, I don't, I won't.

Some people don't get that and I don't really care if they do. They don't have to. That's how I roll and you don't have to like it, nor do you have to be my friend. Bye.

Rarely, if ever, do I quote Beyonky saying anything but she said this in one of her songs:

"There are plenty of people who don't like me but 10 times more who love me and I love myself"

And this is why I could care less if all of a sudden someone wants to ask me stupid questions like they didn't know I call clowns out for who they are...clowns.

And that's what I thought was funny today...the end.

2 points of view:

Kofi Bofah said...

U mad?

Assertive Wit said...

why would you assume I was mad? LOL
just a public service announcement...

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